Taco Bell

Dorigen,

Please explain Taco Bell.

Emily

Emily,

There is no way I can be unbiased whilst discussing Taco Bell. Much like The Greatest Television Program of All Time, Taco Bell is such a beloved component of my childhood that I am immune to any negative criticism it may attract. I had Nachos Supreme (with no beans), one hard shelled taco and a small pepsi for lunch every day for two full years of my life.

Delicious. I would have the same for lunch every day now if there were ANY classic Taco Bells in ALL of New York City, which there are not. They have systematically shut down all Taco Bells in and around the downtown Manhattan area over the past 10 years. Many tears have been shed (by me) over this. There is still a KenTacoHut near Union Square, but that place is so disgusting, even I won’t eat there unless I’m REALLY craving a trip south of the border. I don’t understand why there was a need to merge Kentucky Fried Chicken, Pizza Hut and Taco Bell into one Frankenstein of a fast-food hell. IMHO, each one can stand on its own as a legitimately acceptable fast-food joint. There is a management problem here. Even Charlize Theron loves Taco Bell. See the first 1:30 of the following:

Meanwhile, I love Charlize Theron.

Recently a law suit over Taco Bell using “a meat mixture that contains binders and extenders, and does not meet the minimum requirements set by the U.S. Department of Agriculture to be labeled as ‘beef'” has caused quite a kerfuffle in the news. My response to that is: no sh*t, sherlock. Do you really think fast food joints are serving fresh locally sourced meats and produce? That sh*t is still delicious. On a side note, the use of so-called pink slime in schools is kind of scary. Let’s focus our attention there instead, and leave my beloved Nachos Supreme alone.

In the meantime, I will continue to cling to my memories of the Taco Bell of yore and pray that they somehow manage to stay in business long enough for my children to enjoy.